CBS News reports that al-Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden has been killed, and his body is now in U.S. hands. President Obama announced that he would make a statement tonight, but few other details are available at this time. Now to play "Ding-Dong, the [Wicked] Witch Is Dead!" from "The Wizard of Oz."
UPDATE1: Here's the transcript of President Obama's speech on Sunday night.
UPDATE2: FOX News offers more details surrounding Osama's last stand.
UPDATE3: Time to revise a joke that's made the rounds before:
Osama bin Laden and the 72 Virgins
After getting killed at his mansion in Pakistan, Osama made his way to the pearly gates. There, George Washington greets him: "How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!" yells Gen. Washington, slapping Osama in the face.
Patrick Henry comes up from behind. "You wanted to end the Americans' liberty, so they gave you death!" Henry punches Osama on the nose.
James Madison comes up next, and says, "This is why I allowed the Federal government to provide for the common defense!" He drops a large weight on Osama's knee.
Osama is subject to similar beatings from John Randolph of Roanoke, James Monroe, and 66 other people who have the same love for liberty and America.
As he writhes on the ground, Thomas Jefferson picks him up to hurl him back toward the gate where he is to be judged.
As Osama awaits his journey to his final very hot destination, he screams, "This is not what I was promised!"
An angel replies, "I told you there would be 72 VIRGINIANS waiting for you, Dumbass! What did you think I said?"
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