Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Helpful Tips from David Letterman

“Top Ten Dumb Guy Ways to Save Gas”:
10. Put it on the endangered species list (Kokomo, IN)
9. Push your car to work (Houston, TX)
8. Drive only at night (Bethany, OK)
7. Drive in reverse until tank is refilled (Blaine, WA; this guy probably experiments with playing country music records and tapes backwards)
6. Stop showing up for work every day (Rock Falls, IL)
5. Only drive downhill (Mounds View, MN)
4. Take the wife’s car (Hoffman, Estates, IL)
3. Fill the car with helium gas to make it lighter on the road (Camp Hill, PA)
2. Try to be in Oprah’s audience every day—she’s gotta be giving gas away soon (Ridgefield, CT)

And the NUMBER ONE way to save gas...

1. Take your wife and mistress out to dinner at the same time (Nashville, TN).

No comments: